when it rains

Macbook is officially dead. I know this, but in my heart of hearts I am still in denial. I am now typing from my mini keyboard and my ipad. I hate it. However, here is the thing. I need to write, I need t0 write a lot becuase  this is my memoriam, my year of slow death and decay. My year one doesn`t feel light at all, I feels as though I am in mourning. Fucking darkness, it’s stalking me now. It’s behind each window, in every breath, in the mirror, in stillness along side the road that is my life.

i typed that paragraph yesterday, re eading it now it seems a tad melodramatic.

i have spent most of the last six weeks ajusting to a very brand new schedule. I ended up getting a new/ old job. New in that it’s a full time postion coordinating religious ed, youth ministry and young adult ministry. Old in that its at CTK and i am once again coordinating youth ministry.

Pros and cons exist obviously, i am home every night predictably for my kids, i am driving 3 hours per day to make that happen. I am ballooning up already, for me, well for anyone really it’s so bad for you.

I don’t love living in port alberni, its a small dumpy town and i don’t know anyone. One wish, would be to move the kids and I over to courtenay. Man oh man, that would be amazing. I only work 8-3 for the most part, 10 to 6 on wednesdays and 3-10 on saturdays. but still imagine, it would be so beautiful to have that opportunity – leisurely mornings, home for lunch, whole afternoons off.

the kids are very very happy i am back. especially DS, i think he is enjoying having his Maslow needs met by me, DD too for that matter. and really that’s why i am here.

Stupid keyboard. It’s hard to punctuate.

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