Usually when I start writing something I have a tag line in my head.. but today I’ve got nothing. I feel like writing today for the reason I have always been drawn to writing, to ease tension to work out something going on in my mind – in the depths of it and to process what is on my heart these days.
July 3, 2013 – 0 + 7 + 0 + 3 + 2 + 0 + 1 + 3 = 16 – 1 + 6 = 7 = Enlightenment, love, luck, peace, Happiness.
15 days ago I walked into the Terminal City Club (even the name lends it self to a higher playing power of fate – terminal being a point of jump off) and since then my life has been a whirl of steady charisma. I feel very comfortable here yet at the same time – my body is shouting at me. I have no idea if what I am feeling is an internal sub-conscience red flag? If I can be my most basic literal self for a moment, there is NOTHING wrong with this situation. I am in the company of a man that – at the very least is in very serious ‘LIKE’ with me, and at best has fallen hard. It’s what I wanted right? While laying there on the beach last month on my Broken Group trip – the transition day of the super moon – I asked for this.
Although the commitment feels scary, I did want this.
That was literally hours before we first connected. Impact.
I wasn’t really looking for him at all.
June 23rd, 2013 – 0 + 6 + 2 + 3 + 2 + 0 + 1 + 3 = 17 – 1+7 = 8 = Power.
For what ever reason – at 2 am that night in my tent, while listening to the waves lap dangerously close – and truly being present to the absolute magnanimity of the very place I was It was as if a great tremor shook the world I knew and that’s when it happened. He wrote me. He sent me an email that took my breathe. I remember feverishly sitting up and and with an open jaw, going what the heck – who is this guy?! He wrote so poetically, he commented on several of my pictures and then took an obvious leap of faith and wrote to me from his heart. I was off the grid for the most part that weekend so I simply replied “Loved this, takes a lot to grab my attention, well played. I am currently in the middle of no where in a tent on an island in the pacific ocean – will write you properly when I return to civilization.” or something to that effect. Between that moment and our real time conversation – he sent me a few more emails – all so crazily inline with my heart of hearts. That’s how this all started. He drew me in with his worlds, his intellect, his humour, his wit, his charm. When we actually talked on the phone, it was the epitome of ease. So charming, so charming in fact I immediately felt distrustful. 🙂 LOL I marked him as a player.
It is funny though that little quiet voice that whispers, listen to your heart..
After a bit of time, talking, emailing and texting we decided to meet up. You know the first date.. well actually you know first thru 3rd dates – they happened here in Vancouver – urban life in all it’s glorious indulgence.. As you know – I am always open to trying new things, I love adventure, I love spontaneity, I do – I really do buuuuut to make this man even more attractive to me – dates 4 through 7 happened on my turf.
So not only does City guy speak to me with sincerity, love and a very jovial nature, he is alpha through and through. He’s an ardent athlete – and loves and I mean genuinely loves to spend time in nature. I joined him at his mountain residence and we spend three days reaching the summits of various local peeks, we went mountain biking, hiking, and seriously prioritized being present, watching sunrises, sunsets, the stars, the beautiful green aesthetic beauty of all that surrounded us. Well – if I wasn’t at peace with the decision to try on “girlfriend” status before – he swept me that weekend.
It’s pretty rare I think to meet someone that fits so incredibly well into your idea of mate. It’s not lost on me that we are very different – he’s 15 years older & lives a very different day to day existence but – despite that I feel that we can and will bring out in each other a side that isn’t easily available to the public in general. I bring to him zen and peace and trust and fire, he counters my fire and brings out in me drive, and safety and challenge and contentment.
I am ocean, he is mountain.
This is the beginning of our story, Libra Man meets Virgo Girl.
I am a deeply intuitive romantic, this is reckless on every human level but when it’s good, by God is it ever good. I am going to let him see this in me. My Leo cusp is roaring with pleasure. I am as much alpha as he is and I know that attracts him as it does me.
Right now, that’s all I know. That’s all I can see. I don’t know where I will be in a month, I don’t know what’s in store for us – all I know is that – right now this is exactly where I want to be.
My body is nervously trying to fend off love – I know it’s only trying to protect me. My heart is strong though. If this guy breaks it – it’s a risk I am prepared to take – it will be but a small crack that my spirit will heal. LIke always, I am all about go hard or go home, this will be no different.
I hope that soon, my body will let go of the fight and trust my heart. Once that happened, there is no telling where City guy and I may end up.