God is laughing at me, I think.
Another weird day, but as always He is ever present.
I think the primary thing fuelling this bad day – is lack of sleep.
I’ve witnesses an answered prayer but in the answered prayer it’s taking it’s toll. I am really struggling to manage my malevolence level. I randomly opened my bible asking the question of God to take this away. I asked for help and my finger went directly to a Psalm in which it was telling David he was being tested. UMMM. Okay. That’s not clear at all, and by not I mean it IS.
Where my finger rested was this Ps.11-5 and then my eyes saw this – Ps. 12-3. God is testing you, don’t speak evil of the one you are in conflict with. Right there. Couldn’t be any clearer than that.
Confidence of the Presence of God.
The Lord tests the good and the bad, hates those who love violence.
Prayer against Evil Tongues.
Those who tell lies to one another speak with deciding lips and a doubt heart.
Grrr. So now I have been thoroughly warned. And I am still hanging onto my anger. My choice, My downfall.
Breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe, Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, Have Mercy on me, a poor sinner.
Calming. Calm. Be.
Well I’m calming. This helps. I have processed my anger. At least for now – it’s dissipating.
I have been incredibly two faced today, venting but also slandering. I will stop. Right now.
Yesterday someone asked me if I had the gift of discernment of spirits. I don’t know for sure but – I do know one thing I certainly sense energy in people, places, things. Both positive and negative. I am sensitive to peoples auras and the feelings and things they project. More often then not – especially when I am in a very open mood I can actually miss the world around me and get so brutally caught up in the internal world of feelings and processing that I miss what’s right in front of me.
I used to notice it a lot when I was driving, I’d arrive and then realize I had no recollection of how I got there. Automatic pilot I used to joke – but now as my faith grows.. I wonder.
Thanks be to God for all the gifts he has given to me.
Especially for walking with me through this day.
Jesus, everything that is done in this hour is done for the LOVE of YOU.